Drowning In You
by LaueHime
Summary: Decided to keep going, Lucas almost drowned after trying to save Nathan. Brooke just wishes for him to wake up until he does. Now she realises that something is wrong, really wrong. BL,NH, with little LP. R&R please!
1. Going Under

**Hey everyone! Ok, today I went walking with my ipod and when I was listening to this song I just thought I had to write something about it so this is a short oneshot on the song "going under" by evanescence. The story is settled right after the finale of the third season.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own one tree hill and/or any of its characters and quotes. Same thing for the song.**

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Lucas was driving when he saw Haley screaming on the edge of the bridge. She stood up really quickly and went to him. "_Lucas_!" she opened the door and helped him out. "…_Rachel and Cooper fell over the bridge and in the river and then Nathan jumped over and he hasn't come up for a really long time_!" she screamed. A body floated over the water. "_Nathan!!" _Haley yelled. "_Oh god…"_ Lucas said before pulling off his tux and jumping in the water. He got to the body and swam to the edge of the river. "_Help him Luke!_" Haley screamed. Lucas turned the body to face him. "_It's Cooper!_"

He dove back into the river and found the car where Nathan and Rachel were stocked. He saw Nathan gasping for air in the little space he had left to breathe and appeared right next to him. "_Nate…I got Rachel…". _Nathan looked at him "_Luke?" _he asked confused. "_Go be with…Haley!"_. Nathan nodded and took a last deep breath before going out the opened window. Lucas breathed to regain a little bit of his strength and tried to untie Rachel. It was easier than he thought. He would just have to get her out and swim to dry land. He put her up but just then a sharp pain went trough his chest.

_**Now I will t**__**ell you what I've done for you  
50 thousand tears I've cried.**_

He thought about Brooke. About all they've been trough. About their broken relationship. About their lies--about his lies. He really did hurt her bad.

_**Screaming, deceiving and bleeding for you  
And you still won't hear me**_

He managed to push Rachel with all of his might but couldn't stop thinking about his confession to Brooke.

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"_So you're gonna tell me what this is about?" he asked._

"_Maybe you should tell me about it" she answered angrily._

"_C'mon Brooke…"_

_She took a deep breath before she spoke "Peyton told me some things about the two of you…"_

_Lucas sighed and caught her eyes in his "Brooke…I understand that you worry about my past with Peyton but you gotta understand the circumstances this time…I mean…god she was bleeding and she thought she was gonna die...I mean...the kiss…meant nothing!" he said trying to convince her that her truly loved her. She looked shocked at his statement. _

"_What kiss? Did you kiss her again?" she asked angry._

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Lucas thought about how much he screwed up and pain grew higher in his chest.

_**Don't want your hand this time **__**I'll save myself.  
Maybe I'll wake up for once  
Not tormented daily defeated by you  
Just when I thought I'd reached the bottom**_

Lucas kept thinking about how much he really lost Brooke this time but he couldn't. He loved her just so much. He thought about the night they became exclusive.

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_Lucas heard a knock on the door and opened it to see a grieving Brooke with a box in her hands._

"_There are_ _82 letters in here and they're all addressed to you. I wrote them all this summer, one a day, but I never sent them because I was afraid."_

"_Brooke…"_

"…_I was afraid of getting my heart broken again_,_ like before 'cause you hurt me so bad and I was afraid to be vulnerable and I was afraid of you and the way you make me feel. I know that it doesn't matter now after what I did, but I just thought that you should know. This is how I spent my summer, Luke, wanting you. I was just too scared to admit it."_

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Lucas felt bad again has he reunited all his strength and pushed Rachel. She got the top of the water.

_**I'm dying again**_

Lucas looked as the sky seemed to blur and wash away. He couldn't do this to his mom but he didn't have the choice. All his strength had left his body just like Keith did. Oh Keith. He was gone too and Lucas hade a hard time leaving it behind.

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_"I know Jim...but if I don't get her out of here she's gonna die..." he said to the kid who was holding a gun in his face._

_"I didn't mean to hurt her..."_

_"We know that Jimmy" Keith said appearing in the corner._

_"What the hell is this! The school's on lockdown!"_

_"She's hurt Jimmy..."_

_"I didn't mean it" said the kid so mad about what he did to Peyton. He shot her. He never intented in hurting anyone but he did. Keith looked at him with a relieving look._

_"Go on Luke!" he said walking in front of his nephew. _

_"Keith..." Lucas said worried as he walked behind him and to the door._

_"Luke...you know I love you...now go!" he said as Lucas looked at him with so much fear in his eyes._

_After that, Keith died and Lucas and his mom were left alone..._

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_**I'm going under  
Drowning in you  
I'm falling forever  
I've got to break through  
I'm going under**_

Lucas began to sink. Water became heavier on him and his eyelids started to close. Again, he saw Brooke's face.

_**Blurring and stirring **_

_**the truth and the lies.**_

_**So I don't know what's real and what's not** _

Right know he didn't even know if she still loved him and it hurt like hell because he knew he was the guy for her and he wanted to proove it but he just couldn't fight anymore.

_**Always confusing the thoughts in my head  
So I can't trust myself anymore**_

He slowly lost hope and he felt sorry for his brother and friends. Then he thought about his mom. "Sorry mom" he thought.

_**I'm dying again**  
_

**_I'm going under _  
****_Drowning in you  
I'm falling forever_  
_I've got to break through_**

He slowly closed his eyes. Dark surrounded him as he left his body float in the cold water. He could hear Brooke's voice. She was pleading him to hang on. This was not real because deep down he knew she wasn't there. Everything suddenly went black.

_**So go on and scream  
Scream at me I'm so far away  
I won't be broken again** _

He didn't know if he had make it. He could hear voices around him but everything seemed so far away. He actually thought he was hearing his mom begging him to open his eyes but she just seemed so far away. He wanted to go and join her but he felt just so weak. He could hear some voices he didn't know. They were saying phrase that just seemed so blur since he could just get some little parts of them. "_We don't know if…gonna wake up…seems like…lungs and heart…"_. He didn't bother focusing more on that. He just felt like he could sleep forever. Just as he thought like giving up—he felt her. All of her being was driving him crazy. Her perfume, her shampoo, her soft skin, her warmth…he knew it was her and he felt like she was crying. He really felt bad for leaving her behind. Her voice seemed to be the only one he could clearly hear. The soft sound of her voice got to him like if she was whispering softly in his ear.

"_Please Broody…I'm so sorry…wake up please! I love you…"_ _  
_

**_I've got to breath__e_**

**_I can't keep go__ing under_**

"_Please boyfriend…please Broody…don't die on me! Don't leave me…I'm so sorry…"_

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_Lucas __ran after Brooke and joined her in his yard—begging her to stay._

"_Brooke! I'm sorry…what you did with Chris it's ok!"_

"_It's not. It can't be. It's too much to forgive." She said crying.  
_

_**"**__Well, that's too bad because I forgive you." He answered smiling.  
_

_**"**__But…__You can't."  
_

_**"**__I just did, so you're just gonna have to deal with it!.. I'm the guy for you Brooke Davis and I know I hurt you pretty bad the last time we were together but..."  
_

_**"**__I love you." She said crying even more.  
_

_**"**__I love you too… pretty girl" he said stroking her hairs from her face before kissing her softly on the lips._

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She just sat there for hours taking his hand in hers.

"_Please Luke...open your eyes...ok just...tell me if you can hear me ok...just squeeze my hand and let me know you still here with me..."_

She didn't feel anything. A tear rolled down her cheek as she felt a small, weak squeeze in her hand.

"_Lucas? You awake…" _Brooke asked with a tone that drifted between relief and anxiety. His eyes slowly fluttered open.

"_Brooke…Cheery…" _he said so weakly.

"_Thank god you awake!"_

**I can't keep going under**

"_I came back for you…I love you…pretty girl!"_

**Haha. So what do you think ? Like it? Hate it? Just let me know. If you took the time to read you should have a little 1 min more to review. Thanks for reading.**


	2. Away From The Sun

A/N: Hey guys, I first want to say a big thank you to those who left reviews. They were short but really meaningful to me so thank you. _Lucasluvforever_ actually gave me an idea when she said she liked keep-going on a story and I started thinking about it trying to figure out if there was a way I could continue this story. This summer, I was in my pool talking about the news on TV. They talked a lot about kids drowning in their pools so we talked about that and what drowning was. I started thinking back about my one shot and the message I got from Sarah (thanks to you!!). I was thinking when an idea hit me right in the face and couldn't know why I haven't thought about it before. I think I'll make a story with songs like I did in the first chapter so this is a short part of what I thought. Just tell me if you like it and if you do, I'll keep going.

Enjoy! The lyrics are from 3 doors down "away from the sun"

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_Previously in One Tree Hill…_

_Help him Luke!_

_It's Cooper!_

_Nathan, go be with Haley!_

_Sorry mom…_

_Brooke…_

_We don't know if he's going to wake up. It seems like his heart and lungs suffered from the time we took to get him out of the water_

_Please Broody…I'm sorry! Don't leave me. Don't die on me!_

_Lucas, you awake?_

_I love you pretty girl…_

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**It's down to this  
I've got to make this life make sense  
Can anyone tell what I've done  
I miss the life  
I miss the colours of the world  
Can anyone tell where I am**

"I came back for you…I love you…pretty girl" Lucas whispered while Brooke was stroking his hairs back. He could see the tears forming in her eyes.

"Hey, don't cry! I'm okay now" he said.

"Yeah…" she whispered.

"Sorry for asking but, huh, what happened? I mean, what am I doing here?" he asked confused.

"You…you jumped in the river to get Nathan" she said trying her best to put a comforting smile on her face.

Lucas tried to put the pieces together. What was he doing at the river? Why was Nathan in the river? Why did he go after Nathan?

"Huh Brooke you sure?"

"Yeah why?"

"Why would I go get Nathan? I hate him!"

**'Cause now again I've found myself  
So far down, away from the sun  
That shines into the darkest place  
I'm so far down, away from the sun again  
Away from the sun again **

Brooke looked confused but she didn't ad anything. What was wrong with him?

"Luke, I'll go get a doctor okay?"

"Come back soon!"

She nodded and left the room. As soon as she spotted a doctor, she sent him to Lucas' room but she couldn't go back yet. She felt like something was wrong with Lucas. His last words kept repeating in her head. _Why would I go after Nathan? I hate him!_. She shook her head to wash this sentence away but it came back until she reached an examination room where Nathan sat, Haley holding her hand.

"Hey Brooke, how's Lucas?" Nathan asked.

"He's good. He just woke up"

"Really! Can I go see him?" Haley exclaimed.

"Sure" Brooke said giving Haley a hug before she left the room.

Nathan noticed Brooke's confused look and he couldn't help but worry that everything was not exactly okay with Lucas.

"Brooke, is everything ok?"

"Yeah…yeah" she said avoiding his eyes.

"Brooke, look at me in the eyes and tell me everything's fine". She looked up at him but almost immediately looked everywhere in the room. She couldn't say that everything was fine because she didn't even know if this was the truth. Lucas seemed distant like they hadn't live memorable moments together. Maybe he was still mad at her for yelling at him after he apologized for kissing Peyton in the library. Nathan noticed that she was bothered and tried to find the cause of it.

"Brooke, what's bugging you?"

"I don't know. Lucas is weird…"

**I'm over this  
I'm tired of living in the dark  
Can anyone see me down here  
The feeling's gone  
There's nothing left to lift me up  
Back into the world I know**

Haley threw herself in Lucas' arms as soon as she entered his room.

"My god Luke you got me so worried!!" she exclaimed squeezing him harder against her.

"Hales, it hurts!" he said.

"Sorry…", she was definitely embarrassed but she had almost lost him.

She looked at him for a second. He was pale but applied a shiny smile on his face. She figured out nothing was wrong with him and Brooke was just being worried over nothing.

"I missed you" she said.

"Yeah…but considering our last conversation…" he said looking down.

"What!? What are you talking about?", she was definitely confused. The last conversation they had, he was telling her how much he loved her and that she would always be her best friend even if she was happy with his brother. What was he talking about?

"You know Hales…don't ask!"

"What the hell are you talking about? Last time we talked, you proposed to walk me down the aisle!"

"What?! Last time we talked we were in my room! What the hell is that aisle thing? You're not married!" he said picking his left hand. When he saw her wedding ring, his face changed and became darker then ever.

"It's Nathan isn't it" he spat with some much anger.

"Luke! You were there! You were Nathan's best men!" she cried.

Lucas shook his head. He looked at Haley with some much anger that he could've destroyed a mountain if he found one.

"What is wrong with you?" she asked, tears forming in her eyes.

"Do like you said the last time we talked" he spat.

"What the hell Luke?"

He was about to tell her to get out when Brooke walked back in with Nathan behind her. When Lucas saw Nathan with Brooke, his fists and his teeth clenched. Haley saw his look change and turned her head to see her best friend and husband.

"Guys, something's wrong!" she said with tears on her face.

"Yeah, something is definitely wrong! Nathan, what the hell are you doing here?" Lucas snapped.

"Watching on my brother…"

"Don't bother" Lucas spat.

"Luke what is wrong with you? Did your mood drown with you in the river?" Nathan asked with a slight grin. Lucas' eyes darkened and he sent him a dark glare.

"Nathan, get the hell out! I don't even know why you came in the first place but get out! You always despised me and what, now you want to be friends? Get out! Bring Haley with you!"

Brooke felt like Nathan was about to jump on Lucas for being such an ass to Haley but he didn't move. Instead of that, he stared at his brother with a worried and questioning look.

"What happened to you?" he asked in a whisper.

"You happened to me. Now get out!" he spat.

Brooke walked to Lucas' bed as Nathan and Haley left the room. Haley was crying too much to look back. Brooke was apparently the only one Lucas listened.

"What happened, Lucas?" she asked. "In the water…" she added.

"Actually, I can't remember anything. I only have a feeling that there's some part missing…" he admitted.

"Okay…" Brooke had a bad feeling but this couldn't be it, right? _Right_? "Luke, the last time we talked, what was it about?" she asked now wondering.

"Uh…we were walking and you said you loved and I was nervous and…"

"Wait…" she said. No, this can't be it! Please! She thought.

"Lucas, how much years of high school have you had?" she asked a really worried look in her eyes. Lucas was surprised of this question.

"Brooke, why do you ask me that? You're with me at school! What a question!" he said now confused.

"Lucas…" she started, "We're seniors…"

It's down to this  
I've got to make this life make sense  
And now I can't tell what I've done

"Brooke, we can't be seniors!" Lucas said.

"Lucas we are! And now Nathan and Haley got married again and that stupid Rachel stole their wedding limo and sent it in the river, taking Uncle Cooper with her. Then Nathan jumped but never came back, then you arrived and jumped…and you saved everyone! At least for now…Cooper's not good though…"

Lucas looked confused during all her speech. "Wait? Who's Rachel? And Cooper?" he asked.

"Rachel! That bitch who tried to sleep with you while we were dating!" she yelled.

"And Cooper…" Lucas wondered.

"Nathan's hot uncle!" she exclaimed.

"But I don't remember…"

"Lucas…"

"If you're right then, I forgot about my own life!" he said worried that Brooke could be right.

**  
'Cause now again I've found myself  
So far down, away from the sun  
That shines into the darkest place  
I'm so far down, away from the sun  
That shines to light the way for me  
To find my way back into the arms  
That care about the ones like me  
I'm so far down, away from the sun again**

Brooke got Nathan and Haley to come back after explaining the situation. They also got the visit of the doctors. Lucas still replayed what he said, word for word, his in mind. "Mr. Scott, well it seems like the lack of oxygen had some consequences on your memory. This is definitely something rare but you got to understand that we were really close to loose you. You might recover your memory but the opposite is also possible. You might never remember what happened that you don't remember…"

Lucas shivered at the thought of never knowing what happened in his life. The things he learned at school, the friendships he developed, did he miss any drama. While the doctor had talked with Lucas, the others stayed in the hallway.

"Should we tell him about Keith?" Haley asked.

"Only if he asks…" Nathan said.

"I don't want to be the one to pop the news" Brooke said.

"Maybe we should just tell him the stuff he asks about. We don't even know what he does remember. What is his last day that he remembers?" Nathan said.

"Maybe he'll tell us!"

As soon as the doctor left the room, they all entered and sat in the room.

"So Nathan and I are friends huh!" Lucas said.

"Yeah Bro, since a year a half"

"Woa! This much! I don't remember…also that you and Hales got married twice!"

"I guess you two got close when we first wed" Haley said.

"What about Peyton?" Lucas asked having a pretty good memory of the last time they were together. He thought maybe Brooke found out with the dark look in her face.

"You remember kissing her?" Brooke immediately spat.

"In the library…" Lucas whispered lowering his head.

"I kinda forgave you two for that" she said.

"Just know that I regret with all my heart! I don't know why but I feel like it was terribly wrong and seeing the way you took care of me and that we seem to be dating. Just know Brooke that I love you! I really do! But I don't even know how much time slipped since the last memory I have…" Lucas said.

"What is it exactly" Haley asked.

"Well, I remember us fighting and me and Brooke at Peyton's then it's blur…"

"It's a long time ago! I don't even remember" Brooke said.

"Sorry we can't help" Haley said.

"So except for the weddings, what'd I miss?"

"My clothing line!" Brooke said fiercely.

"And Peyton's benefit concert" Haley said.

"And Haley was in it!" Nathan added after Haley.

"Really!" Lucas exclaimed. "Hales, I didn't know you were a singer!" he added.

"The hell of a singer" Brooke giggled.

"Dan was also set on fire!" Nathan grinned and knew it would cause a reaction from Lucas.

"Really! Is he dead?" Lucas asked almost praying for him to be.

"No…" Nathan whispered. "Sorry" he added.

"He also had a heart attack a year before that" Haley said.

"This guy is invincible" Lucas chuckled. "A plane could land on his head and he'd make it with scratches!" he added which made a wave of laughter in the pale hospital room.

"Where's Keith?" Lucas asked.

A heavy, awkward silence installed itself in the room. It was the question they all feared the most. When he left the room, the doctor told them to not reveal any bad memories that could hit even more. Lucas was weak and he didn't need that right now. How to say a thing like that? How could you possibly tell the kid that the man he loved most was killed? The news broke his heart when it happened. How could they break it again? Realising they didn't have the choice and Lucas' eyes only wanted more, the girls turned to Nathan.

"Uh, well…Lucas this is hard but uh…Dan thought that Keith was the main reason of his heart attack so he hired a girl to seduce Keith and then break his heart. It worked just as Dan had planed it because Jules, the girl, really fell in love with Keith and uh, you found out about it then you moved in with Dan and your mom was trying to find a way to bring you back home and Andy, your mom's boyfriend made an investigation and they found out about Jules and uh…well you know, finally Keith found out what Dan did and he packed his stuff and left town. He never came back…sorry" Nathan lied. When he thought about it, this wasn't really a lie. He just left the part where Keith came back, got engaged with Karen and then, died.

The girl realised what Nathan was doing so they just nodded. Lucas seemed to have a little trouble taking it all in then he whispered it. The clue. The thing that would tell them all what he remembered exactly.

**  
Oh no...  
Yeah...  
I'm gone...**

"Is my mom back from Italy yet?"


	3. How To Save A Life

_Hey, hey everyone! I __know I said I was taking a break but I luckily found a laptop so i can keep up with my work. A bid thank you to all the amazing reviews I got from you and I'm glad you like this story! Especially cuz it was meant to be only a oneshot. Enjoy this chapter._

_--_

**Step one you say we need to talk**

**He walks you say sit down it's just a talk**

**He smiles politely back at you**

**You stare politely right on through**

**Some sort of windows to your right**

**As he goes left and you stay right **

**Between the lines of fear and blame **

**And you begin to wonder why you came**

Lucas was discharged a few days later and his mother brought him back home with the help of all his friends. Between all, Nathan was the one who had been there the most.At Lucas' surprise, Nathan really seemed like a nice person and helped his mother a lot.

He was really pissed though because he couldn't seem to remember anything about the last year. The doctors said that he could eventually regain the souvenirs he lost but he might as well never remember anything at all.

His friends really tried to help him and stick with him but he was becoming more and more closed and he wouldn't let them in and tell them how he really felt. Haley couldn't stop blaming herself for what happened. If she had told Lucas to wait for the backups, he would never have jumped and he would remember everything he wasn't now.

The old brooding Lucas was back now with the fact that he almost died and that a part of his life was missing.

The whole drive home was silent. Lucas kept staring out the window. Karen couldn't help but check on him. She turned her head a few times to see if he was still there. Maybe he would lose himself in his thoughts. The thing she feared the most was the way he would react when old memories would resurface. She wasn't ready for a break down when he would learn that Keith, the men he loved the most was dead. She couldn't believe it herself but it would be really hard on Lucas. They all agreed to not tell him.

Lucas recognized his home when they got in the driveway. _At least we didn't move out_, he thought. He couldn't think of having to have another house and another neighbourhood. He got out of the car and walked to the door he remembered being the access to his room. Karen watched him in amusement as he climbed the few steps and waited in front of the door.

"You can go in you know", Karen smiled.

Lucas didn't respond and opened the door in front of him.

"Welcome home!", everyone was standing in Lucas' room. A banner was hung above his bed, saying the same message his friends just told him. He looked around at the room and it was exactly the way he remembered it.

"You friends put your room in the exact same way it was so you would feel like home", Karen said from the door. Lucas looked around and he remembered everything except maybe a few pictures that seemed recent because he had never seen them before.

"Do you like it?" Brooke asked with a smile.

"Well it's the same way it was…" Lucas moaned

"Does that sound this bad?" Haley inquired.

"No but there's just nothing new…"

"Maybe but it was that or a total new room you didn't know and we though maybe it wouldn't feel like home…", Nathan shrugged.

They heard a slight moan coming from Lucas then he looked around and didn't seem in the good place. He looked as lost as a rich boy in a poor town or a Chinese man in an English world. Haley started to wonder if he really acknowledged their presence. Maybe he didn't. The poor kid looked like he was trapped in his world with no way of coming back.

"Where's Peyton?" Lucas finally asked after several minutes of awkward silence.

Brooke took the punch and swallowed. He was supposed to remember being his boyfriend but the first thing he thought about was Peyton.

"Well, she's not here", Brooke shrugged.

"I can see that", Lucas turned on himself and clearly noticed Peyton's absence.

"We're not really on speaking terms right now"

"Why??"

"It's not important right now…". She smiled sadly and took her gaze off him so he wouldn't see her discomfort.

**Where did I go wrong I lost a friend**

**Somewhere along in the bitterness**

**And I would have stayed with you all night**

**Had I known how to save a life**

Lucas sat on his bed, legs stretched, staring blankly at the wall in front of him. He had asked everyone to go back home and get their sleep. He didn't want all the attention right now. The only thing he wanted was to be left alone in his 'fortress of solitude'. He felt like there was a lump in his throat. A mixture of anger and depression. Maybe he should've died in that river. Who was he now? He didn't even know who he was. It was like a part of him was missing. What do you do when you don't know what you like anymore and what you don't? When you don't know who your friends are and where you're not even sure if they really like you.

Maybe they had lied to him to make him feel better. Maybe he didn't have friends and maybe this bridge thing was all a lie. That the uncle Cooper who died from the accident was just an invention from Nathan to avoid telling him the real reason he was there. What had happened for him to lose his memories? Maybe he did this to himself. Maybe he jumped from a roof and knocked his head. Maybe he just had enough from the life he had and his friends hid it from him.

If he wasn't desperate then why did he feel so bad and so sad since the time he woke up? His head might not remember anything but his heart still feels the same thing that in the past. He was sure of that. Even if he doesn't remember what happened, he was convinced that the emotions he had were still there. Otherwise, why did he feel sympathy for his brother and his dad? The last time he remembered seeing them, they were on his wall and he was throwing some knives through their faces. That might have been just a picture in his mind but he still hated the men. Dan always despised him and he hated him for the way he treated his mom.

He heard a soft knock and his door opened tearing him from his reverie. It was Haley. The small brunette stood in the doorway, not sure if she was gonna walk in or out. She just wanted to check on her best friend and make sure he was okay.

"Hey" Lucas said.

"Hey!" Haley responded, offering him a smile.

"Thought you left"

"I couldn't really bring myself to leave my best friend behind…". He nodded and she smiled to him. This smile, he applied it back on his face. Even though the last thing he remembered with Haley was their rough argument, he still felt good in her presence and figured they had sorted things out if she was still looking after him.

He motioned to her to take a seat next to him. Haley shyly walked on the side of the bed and sat next to her best friend. She hadn't recognized Lucas since he woke up after the incident on the bridge and this Lucas was scaring her, a little. At first she thought he became crazy when he was babbling some things about a fight they had then she understood he couldn't remember the past year and promised herself she would help him through this.

**Let him know that you know best**

'**Cause after all you do know best**

**Try to slip past his defence**

**Without granting innocence **

**Lay down a list of what is wrong**

**The things you've told him all along**

**And pray to god he hears you **

"How are you feeling?"

"Lost I guess…", he lowered his head and Haley watched him for a few seconds before she noticed the tears in his eyes.

"Hey, it's gonna be okay!"

"I'm so scared! What would you do if you couldn't remember your own life?! I'm so scared Hales!!" he cried. Haley wrapped her arms around his shoulders and couldn't help but smile ate her nickname. She rubbed his back and calmed his sobs.

"It's gonna be okay", she kept whispering in his ears while patting his back. Lucas cried onto her shoulder and she couldn't keep the tears from forming in her own eyes.

That night, Lucas cried himself to sleep in Haley's arms. She promised she'd stay with him all along and for the first time since the accident, Lucas found the heart to trust. Seeing the kid had fallen asleep in her arms, she stroked her hairs and finally laid down next to him and pulled herself into a ball in his arms. She closed her eyes and listened to his heartbeat, remembering the old times when they were young kids and Lucas begged her to stay over and sleep next to him. She used to curl in a ball and fall asleep listening to the steady sound of his heart, beating. It was just like old times and Haley fell asleep really quickly.

--

A little later that night, Karen came in to check on his son and found him out cold with Haley wrapped around him. The picture of them sleeping like that came back to her mind and she smiled. For the first time since a week, she smiled at the thought her son was safe. She closed the lights and headed back to her room and to the comfort of her bed.

--

Lucas woke up in the morning and found Haley sleeping in a ball next to him. He smiled and made sure he was quiet so he wouldn't wake her up. It was the first time in a long time he saw her sleep and he thought he'd let her. After all, she looked so peaceful. He stayed there a few seconds watching her before he moved, with the most precaution, to his side and rolled off the bed.

He got to his wardrobe and picked up his old hoodie and a pair of jeans. The bathroom wasn't that far and nobody was using it so he figured he'd get a shower before he headed out to Peyton's house. Since he didn't see her for what seemed like forever, he thought he'd stop by and say hi.

--

Haley woke up a little later and found that she was alone. The only thing she saw that was unusual was Lucas' absence and a note on the pillow next to hers.

'_Morning Sunshine,_

_You looked so peaceful, thought I'd let you sleep. My mom made some breakfast and I don't want to miss that so wait for me and I'll be back soon so we can eat together. Just needed a walk to clear my mind._

_See you in a few,_

_Lucas xxx_

She folded the paper back and smiled. Lucas was odd but that's why she liked him. He always made sure everyone was okay before even thinking of himself. Thinking he probably went to see Brooke, she didn't think of a short wait. Maybe he wouldn't be back at all if things went well. She smiled and squeezed the bed sheets, bringing them to her nose and smelling the sent of it. It smelled so much like Lucas. She had always liked the way he smelled. This was an odour you couldn't really identify but it felt like home. There was no way you couldn't feel good with him. Only the thought of him made her smile. God, what would she do without him?

--

Lucas walked in front of the big house that he recognized as Peyton's. He had no doubt that it was hers, seeing her car in the driveway and the way she parked it was all Peyton.

She was sitting on her bed, her pad on her brought up lap, her ipod close and a pencil in the hand. The blonde girl was drawing frantically whilst the music blasted in her ears. She didn't hear him when he came up and jumped when she got her eyes off her drawing.

"Jesus! You scared me!", she shouted taking her earbuds off.

"Didn't mean to I just wanted to see you" he said placing his hands in surrender.

"Really….I mean, he heard what happened at the hospital…"

"And I do remember you don't you think? Plus, I don't really know why but I feel something strong when I'm with you" he said blushing slightly.

"Really! How touching!", they heard from the door. They both turned to see an angry Brooke.

**Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend**

**Somewhere along in the bitterness**

**And I would have stayed up with you all night**

**I had known how to save a life**

"Brooke, what are you doing here?" Peyton demanded.

"I came to pick the rest of my stuff before I moved out"

"So you're really moving in with Rachel?"

"Well, don't complain you have my boyfriend to fill the empty space!" Brooke spat in anger looking at both Lucas and Peyton, her eyes full of pain.

"Brooke, that's not what it seemed" Lucas explained

"Of course Luke, you weren't telling her that you loved her. I must have mistaken then because you are supposed to be my boyfriend and you tell her you love her again!" she shouted.

"That's…wait, again? Brooke I don't know if it happened before but I sure as hell know that I love you. I always loved you otherwise why would I remember dating you?!"

"Because she loves you!!" Brooke shouted pointing toward Peyton.

The blonde girl was startled that her former best friend had said that.

"I know that she loves me! She told me in the library the day I was supposed to pick my mom" Lucas yelled and then realised he just told Brooke that he had mistaken. Peyton avoided looking at the both of them and Brooke faced turned into a disgusted grimace.

Of course she knew about them sneaking in her back during the last year but the timing was different. Brooke had caught them after he broke up with her. He was at her place and they were kissing while Lucas had just told her that he needed some time to be alone and figure some stuff out.

Lucas told her he made some mistakes but were they seeing each other long before that? What was that library thing?

Lucas faced changed abruptly like if something had slipped. Well, something had definitely slipped. He told Brooke that he was seeing Peyton in her back.

**As he begins to raise his voice**

**You lower yours and grant him one last choice**

**Drive until you lose the road **

**Or break with the ones you followed**

**He will do one of two things **

**He will admit to everything**

**Or he'll say he's just not the same**

**And you'll begin to wonder why you came**

**"**What are you talking about**" **she asked in totally different tone. It was more hurt and soft than angry.

**"**O and stop pretending that everything is fine Brooke! You knew what happened between me and Peyton last year. I'm the one who isn't supposed to remember! You told me at the hospital that you forgave us for that so drop it off okay!**" **Lucas yelled.

**"**That's because I didn't know you too were together before the accident!**" **she yelled in frustration. Peyton's eyes widened. Everyone agreed not to talk about the bad stuff that happened in Lucas' life. The point of what he remembered was right before it all started to go wrong. The accident, Nathan crashing the race car, Keith dead…they couldn't bring them self to tell him. Luckily, Lucas didn't seem to notice. **"**Right, so we didn't tell you. I don't know how but it never came…you didn't know. Think about me now. Just for one second! What have you guys told me recently, uh? I told all of you would be good friends and tell me what I missed. Nobody as talked to me since the day I woke up and realized I lost my memory! What do I know uh, that Keith left town, that I'm suppose to be dating Brooke and that the two girls I knew as best friend are mad! Nathan and Haley got married and I'm a senior…this looks not so clear to me does it?!**", **he spat the last words with so much anger that Peyton almost had to hold onto the closet door not to fall.

Lucas looked at them waiting for some answers. His face was red and both girls had never seen him so angry. They understood though…anyone that lost his memory would freak out especially with the few things they told him. They didn't tell him half of the stuff he was supposed to know. Peyton was looking around in desperation and Brooke was fighting with herself to keep her tears inside.

She noticed Lucas' slight frown and the change of look in his eyes. She studied him for a moment before he spoke again.

**"**What accident, Brooke?**", **his tone was totally different. He sounded almost worried.

**"**What?**" **

**"**You said 'you two were dating before the accident'…what…what are you talking about….**", **his voice was hesitant and low.

**"**Lucas…maybe we should really talk…**" **Peyton announced.

**Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend**

**Somewhere along in the bitterness **

**And I would have stayed up with you all night**

**Had I known how to save a life**

**--**

_So that was it for now. Hope you enjoyed it and you can leave me some nice comments. I would really appreciate it! Constructive comments though…I want to improve not be hurt or something. Tell me what you thought and I'll update as soon as I can!_

_The button is there, you know you want to!_

_Ok so good luck to all with school_

_Love and kisses_


	4. Watcha Gonna Do

**A/N: yay, second update of the night! Lol. I am so sorry I didn't update sooner. I feel bad about it, I really do. I hope you guys still stick with this story and I'll try to give you something to compensate for the wait. Again, I am sorry and I'll try updating more often. Enjoy!**

**--**

**Lately I've been wondering who I am  
because it's coming clear that there's  
a world of things  
that I don't quite understand  
**

Lucas stared at Brooke then at Peyton and then back again at Brooke. _Maybe we should talk…maybe we should talk…maybe we should talk…_Peyton's words were still echoing in his mind before he could even manage to understand what they were about. Something was wrong. Their face, their look, their face…something is wrong…something's not going well. They're talking about an accident…what accident…_we need to talk_…god he hated that sentence. That never means something good. Talking always means something bad. Usually, an accident is bad, right. Bad news. By their looks, the neighbor could guess they were about to say something bad. What happened during the year Lucas couldn't remember? He stared at the two girls, trying to see right through them. Tried to see if he could read them but to no avail, both girls were as cold as broken glass.

"What is it?" he finally asked, his voice cracking and not expecting anything from what was about to come. They started it now they had to finish it. He thought about Haley and how she was waiting for him now. God he wanted her to be there and support him since she was the only one who really stayed like the good old Haley he knew.

"Lucas…there is some things you need to know" Brooke said.

"Like what?" he snapped in impatience.

"There has been a lot of things happening in the year you forgot" Peyton started.

"Tell me, please. I want to know. I feel so lost" he persisted.

"First of all, something really bad happened after your fight with Haley"

"When I went to get my mom?"

"Yes…you and Keith had…kind of a car accident" Brooke explained.

"Really bad car accident" Peyton added.

Lucas nodded to every word trying to make sense of what was being said to him. Okay, car accident, really bad, when getting his mom, okay…Upon seeing his nods, the girls went on.

"Keith was out really fine…just a couple of stitches…" Brooke said.

"So he was ok?"

"Yes"

"That's good. That's really good" Lucas said, his tone was almost frantic. It looked like he was on the verge of a mental breakdown. The poor kid seemed totally out of it. That was all Lucas. Taking care of others before he even cared about himself.

"But you were not so well…", Peyton swallowed hard on those words.

"What about it?"

"Dan is the one who saw the accident…he was there and pulled you two out of the car and drove you to the hospital…" Brooke thought of adding.

"They say he saved your life…" Peyton added barely above a whisper. Her voice was barely inaudible.

Both girls looked down for a second. This was an extremely hard conversation to have. Lucas finally broke the silence.

"How long have I been out?"

"Just a few days…you needed physical therapy for your shoulder though after dislocating it in the crash"

Lucas nodded. It was hard to hear but he didn't show any of it, he just nodded to encourage the girls to go further. During the following hour, they filled him up with information starting from his discharge of the hospital to the lake accident going around the story with stuff like Jake and Jenny, Felix, Anna, Keith and Jules, Keith leaving town, his mom and Andy, the Tric, Nathan and Haley's wedding, Chris, Haley leaving on tour, Nathan crashing the car, Uncle Cooper, Rachel, the Ravens and their bad luck and many other things they thought important that Lucas should know.

--

Haley and Karen were sitting in the kitchen around the table. Coffee mugs in hands and empty plates facing them, they were talking about the wedding that almost killed everyone.

"So, with all that happened I didn't really have the chance to tell you how much I'm happy for your marriage!" Karen declared.

"Thanks…even if that wedding almost killed all the people I care about…if I can get a hand on that Rachel" Haley was getting angry now and Karen could see it as her knuckles were turning white from grabbing the mug to tight. The old woman just smiled and didn't think it was that important for her to add something so she didn't.

The door opened and a really-lost looking Lucas entered the house. Over everything, he looked really pissed off. He stared at the girls for a second. They seemed happy with their little coffee mugs and their already eaten breakfasts. Hypocrites. They hid everything from him. How could they pretend that nothing happened after everything he heard?

"Oh my, I'm sorry we didn't wait you Luke. Is it okay?" Haley said blushing slightly.

"How could you?"

"How could I what? Eat dinner without you?" she asked.

"Hide all the truth from me"

"What are you talking about?" Karen asked now taking place in the conversation.

"I wouldn't be so pissed if the things you all didn't tell weren't so big…"

"What are you…"

"I was at Peyton's…let's say that her and Peyton were not so hypocrites and told me everything that's happened since the year I don't remember"

The smiles that were on the girl's faces merely seconds ago died and let their place to weird expressions, pretty much indescribable so Lucas couldn't know what they were thinking of it all but then neither did Karen and Haley knew what Lucas was thinking about all of this. After all, what did he know?

**I've always tried to look straight in the eyes  
I try to see the man I try to see the plan  
I try to know what's on his mind  
but I never thought that I'd have to stare at you  
no I never thought that someone so close  
could be so far from view  
**

Lucas made a disgusted grimace and walked away, passed the table and the kitchen. Haley ran up to him.

"Lucas, wait!"

"Is there anything else I should know?"

"What did they tell you exactly?"

"Pretty much everything…"

"Then why are you asking what we're not telling you?"

"I don't know…I just thought you guys were my friends and could've told me that when I woke up and didn't know who I was…" Lucas spat coldly. Haley's mouth moved for a second but no sound came out of it. She was paralyzed by Lucas' coldness. In a way, he was right.

He was right that haven't really been good friends. They should have told him everything it just seemed so hard. How could you tell someone about all the crap that happened in his life? Maybe this way, without knowing, he could've started over and be another person. Now that the revelations were made, he would have to deal with the past all over again. The Lucas she knew had troubles dealing with it all. It was just too much for a normal person to carry on her back without having it breaking. How did this kid do to make it through with all this shit going on in his life? Just with the stuff she lived, Haley felt exhausted and overwhelmed. She almost lost her husband and her best friend and her marriage was ruined because of a brat that caused a scene at the wedding and stole the limo then caused the death of Nathan's uncle by sending it under water.

Lucas was thinking back everything that happened and maybe it was time he faced it and moved on. He could feel old Lucas still didn't overcome but he could. He could do it now. He was going to. This was time to forgive and forget and start a new life. Maybe that would be for the best…

**well I guess it's time for me to realize  
that trust is just a word  
not something I ever knew  
but whatcha gonna do**

The next few days, Lucas took them to rest and get some strength back before he had to face school again. This part was going to be the hardest but Haley promised to tutor him and help him catch up with what he missed. She even started giving him some lessons during the day he was resting. How surprised was he when he realized that he could do a lot more than he thought. Maybe his body didn't remember doing it but the brains didn't forget. There was some stuff he could do but could not explain it. It was just happening and he knew what he was talking about even thought he missed that part of memory.

At the end of the week he went to a check up at the doctor's, just to make sure everything was fine. Haley asked his doctor if it was normal that Lucas could make out some part of the things he didn't remember and the man told him that it was totally fine. The heart could never forget, he said. For the other things, Lucas' brain was just working to try to be back the way it used to be and try to remember what he still couldn't even though Peyton and Brooke told him almost everything. Almost. Neither could bring herself to tell him about Keith's death part. They told him at the hospital that he was out of town and honestly hoped they wouldn't have to tell him the truth or he wouldn't want to go to his research.

School was coming faster and faster and Lucas was staring to have bad dreams. Bribes of memory were coming back to him while he slept and that wasn't always something good. He would wake up in sweat, his heart racing. Sometimes, Karen heard his screaming and went by his side, rocking him like a baby till he fell back asleep.

'**cause my dreams leave me cold and empty now  
you know I tried so hard to laugh  
but I just don't know how**

Lucas' first school day was finally there and they all agreed to go with him and support him. As a group, they would face everything if they stayed together and strong.

Haley squeezed Lucas' hand in front of the school alley. They watched the students go in and out. Haley stared at Lucas. He looked as lost as he looked many days ago when he didn't even know who he was. Brooke and Peyton were on the other side of him and Nathan was behind Haley.

"I don't know if I can go" Lucas said coldly.

"Come on Luke, we're here. Everything will be okay!"

"But someone died here"

"We know Lucas…but you see these people, they know too and the world is still spinning even if sometimes it seems madly, the world is still there and one day, you'll have to face it"

Lucas swallowed then decided to take a step forward. He arranged it with his mom so he would only have to go through a half day then it would slowly go back to normal. Haley held his hand while they walked on the school grounds. A girl stopped her walk and turned toward Lucas and his friends. Lucas saw her and his eyes widened.

His mouth fell and he could swear his legs were gonna give out. He felt the warmth of the day so hot that he wondered if he wasn't going to pass out. The girl came closer and offered him only a nod before passing the friends and walking inside the building.

Haley seemed to be boiling in anger then she turned to Lucas and saw his face. Now she couldn't help but laugh.

"Who is that?" Lucas asked, his mouth dry. "She's a babe" he said on the tone a geek would use when he realizes he has sexual feelings for the first time.

Brooke had noticed Lucas face and it hurt her so much.

"That" she said so coldly, "…was Rachel"

"Rachel..it's her?!?!?" Lucas asked seeing the redheaded girl nod again in his mind. Nathan was biting his cheek so much he wanted to laugh and knock some sense out of his nut brother. The girls just rolled their eyes and pulled Lucas inside the school.

The first half day wasn't so bad. Lucas recognized most of the people and teacher he already knew. He didn't feel to bad and finally realized that he did not miss that much things. It would be easy to go back to the way it was. For once, he felt like everything was going to be okay.

He went home in the middle of the day and had the biggest surprise he could expect.**  
**

'**cause wrapped around the thought of everything  
are the hands of a thief  
who took that trust from me  
but whatcha gonna do**

His mom was talking with the devil. Dan. Dan Scott meant everything bad to him. Especially after what he did to Keith. How dared he come back now and talk with his mom. Lucas cleared his throat just loud enough for them to hear. Dan turned his face and saw his older son standing in the doorway. Without a sound, he walked over to him and hugged him.

Startled, Lucas pulled away quickly.

"I'm so glad to see you're okay, son"

"I'm not your son!"

Dan's face changed and it looked almost cruel. He had a naughty smile on. The one Lucas hated so much.

"What do you mean, I'm your dad. It's because of me if you're here today"

"So what now, I should say thanks to you for fucking my mom"

Karen let out a small scream of terror. Since when had Lucas become so harsh and cold? Lucas never swore. She knew it. Her son never swore unless something was really wrong.

"How dare you?" Dan said.

"I bet you tell yourself that I owe you"

"You do. After everything I've done for you"

"Like what? Saving my life? If that was just to make yourself look better or just to get something from me, you could've just let me die"

Karen's eyes were glistening in tears. She had never heard that side of her son. What made him so angry? He was happy all week long and now Dan was there and he was so cold. She didn't recognize him anymore. Dan was starting to get pissed off and god knows that when Dan is mad, some stuff might just slip…

whatcha gonna do  
About the things that happen suddenly  
about the things that I could never see  
all the times I've sat and bought the lie  
all the times I've laughed and wondered why  


"You're talking about that accident? Well, you're right. I should've just let you die. Just to bad these doctors were able to bring you back…I should have signed the papers that said 'do not revive'" Dan spat. Lucas felt the words like if they were each a stab he got. That made a lot of potentially fatal wound that were threatening his life just like the words were threatening his sanity.

"Dan, do not talk like this to my son!" Karen shouted.

"Don't interrupt Karen. This is a conversation between my son and I"

Karen walked in front of Dan and posted himself right under his nose. "Lucas is MY SON so if you want to say anything like this to him, you'll have to walk over my dead body!" she spat. Lucas pushed his mom aside.

"Mom, let me take care of this" he said.

"You look so much like your uncle Keith!" Dan said in amusement.

"Yeah because he was my real dad and it's your fault he's gone"

Dan's naughty smile died on his face.

"You're the one who made him leave town!" Lucas shouted through gritted teeth.

"What are you talking about, joker? Your so-loved uncle is dead!" Dan snapped.

**I realized I was owned by my defenses  
never took the time never saw my chances  
always thought the people coming round  
was just another person trying to bring me down  
but yeah whatcha gonna do**

Lucas' face changed. His expression was gone. His face was blank.

"What…"

**Yeah watcha gonna do**

**Yeah watcha gonna do**

**Yeah watcha gonna do**

**Yeah…**

**--**

**Well I hope I made it up to you with this so long chapter and of course, I hope you enjoyed. Don't forget to leave me those little reviews I love so much. You guys are so sweet that I always love reading them. Tell me what you thought. You guys take care!**

PS. song's from sprung monkey


	5. Hey You

**A/****N:****I**** totally feel like it's been forever since I updated and I'm truly sorry about it. I have just**** been extremely ****busy ****with school and other ****fics**** and then I had to find the perfect songs to fit the story and ideas of course so if you ****guys**** have any, I'll be pleasured to take them. So sorry again for the wait and thank you so much to those of you who left incredibly amazing ****reviews.**** Enjoy this chapter!**

**PS. I ****gotta**** say that I think I'm going to make it a ****Leyton**

**00000**

**Hey you**** O****ut there in the cold**

**Getting lonely, getting old, can you feel me**

**Hey you!**** Standing in the aisles**

**With itchy feet and fading smiles, can you feel me**

Lucas stared at Dan for what seemed like hours. He looked somewhat dumbfounded at the newest revelation. His vision blurred for a brief second. The once smoothing light was now gone. He could hear screams. He couldn't tell where they were from. His eyes were tingling. He was in the school for a second. His arms. He had somebody in his arms. An unmoving blonde form. Peyton. His uncle was standing between him and someone he knew just too well. Jimmy. James 'Jimmy' Edwards. One of his old good friends. Keith was begging him to go. He couldn't say anything. His mind went shock and he could ear himself plead his uncle to let it go.

_I __love__ you know go…_

He finally left the hallway. He was back in the kitchen. He had been standing still all the while. Dan was waiting for him to say anything. The poor kid looked lost more than anything. His eyes were dim. Karen still couldn't believe Dan had gone all Dan Scott-ish and told Lucas about this. Of course, he didn't know about Lucas' memory blank but isn't that what everyone wanted? To exclude the devil from the game, once and for all. For good. Still, this man was not any random man. It was Dan Scott and Dan Scott always had the way of messing with everything and everyone.

Luke finally seemed to snap from his thoughts.

'You bastard. I don't want to see you ever again' Karen said in Dan's direction.

The youngest Scott didn't say a thing but you could read from his eyes that he agreed.

'Well, if that's what you want' Dan was obviously giggling. He had won this battle in hurting Lucas.

'Good-bye, Lucas' Dan said on his snobbish tone.

'You never loved him. You were always an ass to him and now he's gone. How can you stand looking at yourself in the mirror?' Luke asked in disgust.

The old man just gave him a sly grin and left. Karen turned to her son.

'Lucas…'

'Is there anything else I need to know? Or you guys are just lying to me to protect me from something?' he cut her off, half shouting.

'We do want to protect you!' she cried.

'I'm not a fucking egg, mom! Stop protecting me like I was 5! I'm tired of everyone lying to me! It's bad enough not remembering anything!'

'Luke, don't do this, please!' she pleaded with him.

'I'm tired, mom. Just leave me'

She couldn't say more and he was out. Not toward his bedroom but to the only place he could thing of right now.

**Hey ****you!****Don't**** help them to bury the light**

**Don't**** give in without a fight.**

**Hey ****you !****Out**** there on your own **

**Sitting**** naked by the ****phone,**** would you touch me**

Peyton was sitting by her desk, sketching. She had her pad brought her thighs and she roughly covered the paper with a black liner. The music was blasting from the speakers. It was rather slow and sad than her actual hardcore punk music. She thought that considering the situation, she'd pick something deeper.

A soft knock came from the door. She lifted her head to see a tear stained familiar face.

'Hey, Brooke' she said in a low tone.

'Don't do this. Don't 'hey Brooke' me'

'Brooke…'

'No. Don't. I meant what I said after the wedding. I know we did talk to Lucas together and everything, but I cannot get over the fact that you ran after him whist we dated. I just came to make this clear and get my stuff'

She picked a little bag she had started packing before Lucas came in and took the last of her stuff. She didn't even bother to look at Peyton whilst she did it.

'So we're done?' Peyton simply asked.

'As far as I am concerned, we are!' Brooke spat before leaving.

Peyton sat back in her chair, her best pouting look on her face. She turned the music louder than before and started back into sketching.

Half an hour later, another knock made her look up. She found herself lost into Lucas' baby blues.

'Hey, Luke' she smiled.

He tried to give it back but it wasn't as easy as he thought.

'Is there anything else than Keith's death that you didn't tell me?', he didn't intend to be so rude but it came out a little rougher than he expected it to. Peyton avoided eyes contact with him.

'I dint want to hurt you'

'Oh shit, really? Because in the end, that hurts just the same'

'Lucas, please. You were just so depressed when it happened that we thought it'd give you the chance to start over if you didn't know'

He really wanted to say something to this but now Peyton was fully looking at him and he couldn't resist those beautiful green eyes.

His eyes blurred again. He was sitting in the library, looking into the same gorgeous green eyes. She closed them and soon their lips met. It was a short but smoothing kiss. She weakly pulled away.

_Just in __case__ you can't keep your promise…_

'Luke, are you alright?'

He snapped out of this memory and found Peyton staring at him.

'Yeah, just…never mind'

'No, tell me' she pleaded.

He sighed. 'It's just…I think I'm having flashes, like…memories'

'Luke that's a good thing! You're getting your memory back!'

'Aren't you scared I could find some stuff ya'll forgot to tell me?'

She sent him a cold glare.

'Sorry' he mumbled.

'So what about Brooke?' she asked.

'Well, I kinda bumped into her before I came here'

'And??'

'She broke up with me', he said now with hurt in his eyes.

Peyton felt really good inside but she didn't show it. Instead, she pretended to be sorry for him and hugged him.

'Can I stay here for the night?' he asked.

Peyton smiled. 'I was kinda hoping you would'

He grinned. They both laid onto the bed and shared some thoughts

**Hey ****you!****With**** your ear against the wall **

**Waiting for someone to call out would you touch me**

**Hey ****you!****Would**** you help me to carry the ****stone?**

**Open your heart, ****I'm**** coming home**

'So why did Brooke leave you?'

'She said it was too hard to stand seeing me hesitate…and if I really loved her than I would've picked her'

'So she asked you to pick?'

Lucas nodded. They both started laughing.

'And what do you think?'

Lucas sighed and his answer was long to come.

'I think that whatever she tells me about our relationship, I don't feel this way. I mean, I might not remember with my head but my heart knows what attracts it' he admitted.

Peyton felt herself blush. Was she misunderstanding him or did he just say that he didn't feel attracted to Brooke. Her mind was probably playing some tricks on her, but still. It felt good to imagine. After a while, she felt calm enough to add.

'And what is your heart attracted to?'

Her curiosity was obvious trough her voice. Just asking it made her feel weird. On the other hand, Lucas felt calm and aware of where he was going with this.

He started 'Well, there's this girl. I don't know if you already heard of her. She has the most gorgeous green eyes I've ever seen. When you look into you can actually get lost in her soul and that is a place where every guy would dream to be. It feels safe and dangerous at the same time. And then there's her hairs. Their scent. The way they look when I pass my fingers through them…'

All along, they kept their eyes locked. Lucas went to say more but Peyton was faster than he was and placed a long, deep kiss onto his lips.

**But**** it was only a fantasy**

**The wall was too high as you can see**

**No matter how he ****tried,**** he could not break free **

**And**** the worms ate into his brain.**

Nathan and Haley had decided to take it easy for the night. They went for a supper and a movie. It felt like old times to finally be with each other again and not having to care about everything else than to pick a movie they would both like. Of course, it took them a little while to decide which movie they wanted to see since Haley wanted to see a comedy and Nathan was craving for the newest suspense movie.

'But Nate, after all we live through recently, don't you think we'd need to laugh?'

'I only think that I wanted to see this movie for so long!' he replied.

Haley gave him her best puppy dog look. 'Please, baby'

'You can't do that, Hales. Not the eyes!'

She smiled wider than ever. 'Pleaseee'

He sighed. 'You know I can't resist you, you're too gorgeous'

She jumped in victory. She won again. It was always her.

Nathan rolled his eyes.

'Come on or you're going to miss the movie' he chimed.

**Hey ****you!****out**** there on the road**

**Doing what ****you're**** told, can you help me**

**Hey ****you!****Out**** there beyond the wall**

**Breaking bottles in the hall, can you help me**

The kiss between Lucas and Peyton deepened. They were almost on each other and ripping their clothes now.

'Wait' Peyton said. 'Don't you think this is a little soon?'

'It's the opposite. I think it is a little late. Remember that hotel room after we went for your dad? That's how long I've been waiting'

'God I love you so much!' Peyton declared.

'I love you too, Peyton', he stopped a second. 'I just need to know that this is really what you want and that you'll be there'

She smiled. 'There's nothing I want more'

They both smiled before their lips crashed again and they were taken on a passionate and magic spiral.

**Hey ****you!****Don't**** tell me there's no hope at all **

**Together we stand, divided we fall**

--

**All for now.**** Hope you liked it. ****Thought I'd throw a little ****Naley**** in. if you guys don't like what I put in there, just tell me but I thought about doing it ****Leyton**** since I ****couldn't decide and finally made my mind up. Maybe I can get Brooke someone like Chase…just tell me. Any ideas, stuff, suggestion, or whatever you ****wanna**** talk about, just tell me. ****Don't**** forget to review :) **

**Song's by Pink Floyd anyways. I hope you guys read the lyrcis for the hell it takes me to find them..lol**


	6. Sometimes You Can't Make it On Your Own

**A/****N:****I'm sorry if I made it a ****couple that you don't like! Come on ****don't**** blame it on me. See ****I'll**** be sweet and change it since I'm a 'make-it-up-to-you-writer' but please, in the future, don't send hate letters to me for a stupid couple. I like ****brucas**** too. ****Don't**** just hate me for nothing. Whatever, ****it's**** fixed now so for the others who are not concerned by this, enjoy the new chapter!**

**--**

**Tough, you think ****you've got**** the stuff**

**You're telling me and anyone**

**You're hard enough**

Lucas's eyes snapped open. His breath was shaky. It took him a few minutes to realize what had happened. He was in his room.

"Hey Broody, you're awake?"

Lucas turned and saw Brooke stirring next to him. He had definitely woken her. Then it hit him. All of that was a dream. He never went to Peyton's house. Brooke never broke up with him. They were together and she was fine.

"Are you okay?" she asked, concerned about his look.

"Yeah…I just had a weird dream that's all" he said somewhat distant.

"Do you wanna talk?"

He shook his head. Brooke looked down and sighed.

"Why don't you want to open up?"

"It's nothing, really", he tried convincing her but it felt like he was the only one who needed to be convinced.

"I just want to help you" she begged.

"Don't leave me. That's the best thing you can do" he assured. She smiled as she got closer. Their lips softly met.

"So you love me?" she asked just as she wanted to hear it.

"Of course I love you, I love you so much!"

It felt so good to hear. Lucas had been somewhat different after the accident but who wouldn't be? He almost died and woke up with no memories. The only thing she wanted was to make sure everything was really fine and that he would be okay.

"So, are you sure there's nothing you want to talk about?"

Lucas frowned. He tried to think of what he could say to please her but the truth was, he was scared. He was so damn scared. Just the thought of not knowing what would happen tomorrow was enough to scare him for the day. What would happen to him? Would he ever remember his life? Would he die? Would the people he loved leave him because he had troubles opening up?

Fresh tears stung the back of his eyes. He felt the tingling sensation and did his best to keep the tears back but he could no longer hold them. His lips were shaking and a droplets finally struck from the corner of his eye.

Brooke saw it and she felt a stab of sympathy.

"Come here" she said quietly.

Lucas thought about drying his eyes and pulling away but without a reason he just didn't. Brooke's warm embrace met him and he just stayed there, in the warmth of her. She rocked him like a baby and let him cry.

"It's gonna be ok. You'll be fine"

**You ****don't**** have to put up a fight**

**You don't have to always be right**

**Let me take some of the punches**

**For you tonight**

"What if I never remember?"

"You will. I'm sure you will be alright"

He smiled through his tears. "I'm just so scared"

"I'm here for you. I'm glad you're opening up, Luke. This means a lot"

They hugged tightly for what seemed to be forever.

--

It had been a week now and yet, Brooke was the only person Lucas was talking to. The others had tried getting him to talk but he was always really cold about the subject. He never talked about his dream to anyone. In fact, he was trying really hard to forget it.

As much as he avoided the subject, he decided to avoid Peyton. She wasn't the cause of any of it but at least if he kept his distance, he could be with Brooke and not be scared that some stuff would slip.

Lucas was a little pissed about the fact that Dan had to be the one to tell him about his uncle. He barely spoke to Nathan or Haley as well. Really, the only person he spoke to was Brooke. She was just so strong right now. She was like his rock. Always strong and unbreakable.

Haley decided to go against the shell that tore her and her best friend apart. She spotted him by a picnic table.

"Mind if I join you?" she asked.

"Whatever…" he mumbled.

She let out a long and desperate sigh before sitting next to him. He was pouting and his position was rather slumped.

"Lucas, are you okay?"

He shrugged but didn't give any verbal answer.

"Lucas, please talk to me!" she begged.

"Why didn't any of you tell me?"

She hadn't seen that one coming. Her shoulders just dropped.

"We just didn't want to hurt you" she said simply.

"Well you did" he snapped.

**Listen to me now**

**I need to let you know**

**You**** don't have to go it alone**

She wanted to cry out but instead, she bit back her tears and spoke directly.

"What have you done with the real Lucas?"

"He's gone" he spat. "Go get him in the river. Unless you're too scared to jump or to ruin your nice dress," he added. Where did he get that? He didn't know but the scene seemed familiar to him.

"You remember?" she asked frantically.

"Just leave me, Hales!" he shouted.

She stood and clenched her fists. Her voice was shaky but she managed to spit it all out.

"See, you're wrong there. Only my friends can call me Hales"

Lucas didn't look up though her last words hit like a hammer. What is there worse than your friend rejecting you like this? Knowing that you deserved it all.

--

Haley almost ran down to the bathroom. She didn't want anyone to see her crying. She almost ran Brooke over. The brunette tried to get something out of Haley but she was too pissed off and she didn't want Brooke to see her cry as well.

Brooke saw it in her friend's eyes that she needed help and followed her. When Haley got to the bathroom, she instantly looked at herself in the mirror and leaned onto the sink. Brooke got inside the room and saw her friend breaking down.

"Haley, what's wrong?"

Her friend sniffed. "It's Lucas. I just wanted to talk to him and he blew me off"

Brooke was in awe. "I'm sorry, Hales"

"Me too" the girl admitted. "You know, I wish he would just talk to me!"

**And**** it's you when I look in the mirror**

**And it's you when I don't pick up the phone**

**Sometimes you can't make it on your own**

Haley splashed some cold water onto her face and looked at herself. Her features were stretched as if she hadn't slept for the past days. Brooke placed a hand on her friend's shoulder.

"I'll talk to him" she proposed.

"Thanks", Haley sniffled and tried to smile.

--

The day went on slowly. Lucas just wanted to go back home quickly. This way, he would not have to face everything and everyone staring at him. Recently, he had become like a zoo attraction for the students in Tree Hill High. They stared at him all the time and he could hear them whisper and gossip around. He figured he was the only one of them who didn't know who he really was and that pissed him more than anything.

The bell finally chimed as excitation started to burn inside Lucas. This bullshit was finally over. All he'd have to do was go back into his bed and pout like he had gotten used to.

Little did he know that he'd have a little surprise when the time came. He hopped into his car and shoved his backpack on the passenger seat. Out of nowhere came two arms that circled him, followed by an all well-known brunette.

"Brooke, what are you doing naked in the back of my car?" he said surprised.

She smiled and massaged his shoulder.

"I'm stimulating your memory buddy boy", she grinned.

He couldn't bring himself to look behind. Not after everything that happened and not after the dream he had the week before where it wasn't exactly Brooke who was taking him to seventh heaven. God all of that was confusing.

Seconds later, he felt like a mental shock into his body as the images came back. He won his first game with the ravens. He hopped in his car. That brunette girl came out of nowhere. She was naked. The coach caught them. He drove her back home.

"Do you remember now?" she asked after seeing him zone out for a second or two.

"I guess" he simply replied.

The shock hit again as a similar scene started. He hopped in his car, this time to find a redheaded girl in the backseat. He recognized her as the hot girl he spotted the other day. Then Brooke was there. She stood outside of the car. He instantly got up and ran after her. They fought over something he didn't really understand.

"_I wanted you to fight for me!_"

"_How was I supposed to know that?_"

"_You just are!_"

He snapped back into reality again. Brooke looked like she had been waiting for him to come back to earth before she asked about what was wrong.

"Did you just have a flashback?" she asked.

"I don't know. I don't understand how this thing works but I see scenes. I think they're from my past but since I can't remember anything, I'm never sure"

"Just tell me. I'll help you"

He shrugged. "See how that turned out the last time I trusted you and Peyton"

Her fists curled in balls and she was ready to hit something.

"Oh no, you are not bringing this up again. We already apologized for that! You know that we only kept the secret to avoid hurting you!" she yelled.

"That still doesn't change the fact that Dan was the one who had to tell me about it!"

She shook her head. "I'm not arguing this anymore. We'll talk when you know exactly what happened"

**We fight all the time**

**You and I...that's alright**

**We're the same soul**

**I don't need...**

**I don't need to hear you say**

**That if we weren't so alike**

**You'd like me a whole lot more**

"Then tell me! Tell me what happened, Brooke. This way we can fix things and go back to the way it was"

"You don't even remember how it was!", a small tear rolled down her cheek. She was now totally dressed. Lucas looked at her tearful eyes and her saddened look. A shock went through him.

They were dancing. Brooke kept staring at Peyton and Cooper. Lucas knew something was up with her.

_"So you're __gonna__ tell me what this is about?"_

_"Maybe you should tell me about __it__" she snapped._

_"Come on, Brooke"_

_"Peyton told me some things about the two of you"_

_"Look I know that you're worried about my past with Peyton but you __gotta__ understand the circumstances this time I mean—god—she was bleeding and she thought she was __gonna__ die. The kiss meant nothing"_

_"What kiss? Did you kiss her again?"_

She ran off the dancefloor and into the room next to it. He ran after her and started fighting again.

_"I'm not pushing you away, Lucas but I need you to need me back!"_

"Earth to Lucas. Damn it, Luke! You're so hard to follow sometimes!"

He looked at her differently now. He knew they had been fighting just before the accident. Why was she so sweet to him now? She pretty much hated him after the party. Why did she take him back after—from what he understood—kissing Peyton again?

"It didn't mean anything" he said out of nowhere.

"What are you talking about?" she inquired.

"The kiss in the library. It didn't mean anything. I realized the other night that I didn't love Peyton. The feeling I kept sensing when I was with her was shame and guilt. I love you, Brooke. No one else" he confessed.

She smiled and dried her tears. "I love you too, broody"

They kissed and Brooke could feel the warm tears on her cheeks. They weren't hers though. "I need you so much" he cried. Brooke saw Haley walking outside the car. She mouthed something. Haley nodded and joined Nathan.

"I'm here for you." She whispered.

--

After a good reflection, Lucas decided to let Brooke drive him back home. It didn't take long though none of them said any word during all the way. They got to the door leading to Lucas' room and waited there a few seconds.

"I'm glad you're letting me in, Luke. You still have some work to do with Haley and Nathan but you'll pull through"

Lucas sent her a quick smile before turning the handle and entering the room. There were Nathan, Haley and Karen waiting for him. There were no banners, no cakes or no fake laughs. There was just energy. Good energy. They all smiled genuinely.

"Hey guys" Luke said shyly.

"Hey man, how ya doin'?" Nathan asked.

Luke smiled. "Better I guess. Brooke helped me. Listen, I just want everyone to know how sorry I am for the way I've been acting lately. It was weird and I was confused but thanks for everything you did. I really appreciate it."

"Oh it was nothing. It's what friends are for, right?" Haley chimed. They pulled into a hug.

**Listen to me now**

**I need to let you know**

**You don't have to go it alone**

**And it's you when I look in the mirror**

**And it's you when I don't pick up the phone**

**Sometimes you can't make it on your own**

They all spent the night in the living room, sharing laughs, stories and memories. Lucas was finally opening up to his friends. Karen was so happy to see the progress in what seemed to be a so desperate cause. Lucas was really starting to be better. With Brooke's help, they had changed a train wreck into a shinny way to recovery.

**I know that we don't talk**

**I'm sick of it all**

**Can - you - hear - me - when - I -****Sing, **

**you're the reason I sing****You're the reason why the opera is in me...**

**Where are we now?**

**I've got**** to let you know**

**A house still doesn't make a home**

**Don't leave me here alone...**

Haley was starting to get a little tired. Nathan, who was a little overprotective towards Haley since they knew they could lose each other at any moments, decided to bring her back home as soon as she let a too wide yawn escape.

"We'll see you around soon, Luke" Haley said.

"Yeah man, take care of yourself"

"And you take care of Haley!" he replied.

The lovebirds smiled.

"Just know that we'll always be there, Lucas. Whenever you need anything, just ask"

"Thanks"

The happily married couple went back home. Karen attacked the mess in the leaving room, leaving Brooke and Lucas alone to talk. They went into his room.

"So did you have many flashbacks in the car?"

"A few"

Brooke nodded. "Like what?"

He cleared his throat and started to talk in a really bad impression of her voice "I wanted you to fight for me!"

She punched him on the arm. "Hey, you can't use it against me, it's not fair!"

He laughed and faked being hurt.

"You're not even serious! At least old Lucas is back" she joked. He rolled his eyes and went forward to kiss her neck.

"Stop it, Luke. Your mom is in the house"

"So?"

"What if she catches us?"

"Maybe she's gonna ground you for making me sickly in love with you"

She chuckled when he started tickling her.

"Stop it crazy. You're going to get us in trouble!"

He put on a sad puppy dog look and crossed his arms, faking being hurt. She thought that looked funny.

"So this is so sweet that your mom is pregnant!" Brooke exclaimed. Lucas frowned.

A shock went through is body. He could see another scene so perfectly. It was at the wedding again, in the room where he fought with Brooke. Instead, he was with his mom. She was dressing up while he was digging a purse to find her things. What he found was odd though. He got a little box out of the bag and stared at it and then at his mom.

_"Hey mom, are you pregnant?" he said showing the test he found in what he thought was his mom's purse._

_She smiled. "Yes I am"_

_As she got closer, she saw something was up. _

_"But that's not my purse. You know maybe Brooke took the wrong. Brooke?"_

**And it's you when I look in the mirror**

**And it's you that makes it hard to let go**

**Sometimes you can't make it on your own**

**Sometimes you can't make it**

**The best you can do is to fake it**

**Sometimes you can't make it on your own**

"Yeah, that's cool. I'm happy for her" he said after dozing off.

"Me too." Brooke smiled.

There was a silence where Lucas thought really hard. What could he say?

"Hey Brooke?"

"What?"

"Remember you told me we had to be honest with each other?"

"Sure"

"Answer this for me now. At the reception, we found a pregnancy test…" he paused for a second. He couldn't quite say it though his eyes were asking so many unspoken questions. Brooke sighed.

"Yes Lucas…I'm pregnant"

**Sometimes you ****can't**** make it on your own**

**--**

**I hope this fixes my past mistakes. ****Its**** my fault though. I said it was a ****brucas**** so I ****can't**** change it. ****I'm**** sorry I pissed you guys. Anyways, ****I'm**** back on track so leave a nice review please.**

**Song is 'sometimes you can't make it on your own' by U2**


End file.
